I can no t speak for the rest of you, but I personally breathed a huge sigh of relief when I found that Neverland Ranch is not going to disappear in thin air. That’s right, folks, Michael Jackson is going to reclaim all of his repossessed crap!

A little while ago, we broke the unsurprising news that the King of Pop was completely and utterly broke. His precious Neverland Ranch—Jacko’s private amusement park/home/petting zoo—was threatened with foreclosure.  The Ranch itself was estimated at anywhere between $96 and $120 million dollars, which doesn’t include the massive amount of junk (uh, I mean precious “collectables”) that Jackson had stored inside. Perhaps you’re all teensy bit curious about what kinds of bizarre items The Gloved One had amassed over the years? Well, I’ll spare you the anxiety and tell you.

Did you know that MJ owns a scepter, ice cream cart, king’s crown, and life-size model of Darth Vader and the Red Power Ranger? Oh, we couldn’t forget the faireset relic of them all—the paintings of Mr. Jacko as an Elizabethan noble! The host of “Antique Roadshow” would certainly drop dead in his tracks at the prospect of auctioning off some of these babies! If you’re wondering how you can snag one of Wacko’s multiple statues of E.T. or own his infamous iron gate decorated with the British royal family’s coat of arms, you may be too late!

The auction of Jackson’s 1,300+ items has been cancelled! Too bad, so sad. Have you ever encountered a twelve year-old who throws a temper tantrum at the prospect of his/her baby toys being tossed away? It’s not difficult to draw the parallels between Jackson’s situation with that of the 12 year-old found deep inside each of us. Although Jackson was reportedly bankrupt, he threw a fit when his toys were being put up for auction. His production company sued the auction house, and the rest, as they say, is history.

For some reason, the auction folks were terrified at the prospect of being sued by Wacko, and they returned all of his much-loved belongings. Wait, this means that we won’t get to own one of his 13 Swarovski crystal-encrusted white gloves or his bronze statues of frolicking children? That would have looked tres chic in my apartment!

We’re just glad that all’s well that ends well. But knowing Jacko’s dubious financial history, I think that it's safe to say that we haven't seen the last of this auction house at Neverland Ranch.