First impressions are important, right? Right. On a first date you always want to be on your best behavior so that you have a chance at a second, and possibly third, date. Your job on a first date is to present your best face forward, to show your date that you are worth getting to know and to perhaps see again.
Your psychological issues – Really. No one wants to hear about your insomnia, your obsessive-compulsive ordering of your sock drawer, or how your mother made you wear her underwear. Most people have a little (or a lot) of psychological baggage, but there is no reason to reveal too much on a first encounter with someone special.
Your dysfunctional family – Everybody has a little dysfunction in the family, it is the nature of a large network to have some eccentric behavior or just unusual relatives. Don’t tell your date about your uncle who dresses like a woman, your alcoholic great aunt, or your mother who collects twist ties in large jars.
Your ex life or your sex life – If you have recently ended a relationship, don’t spend your first date telling him or her, all about your ex and why the relationship ended. Also, don’t talk about your sex life, your sexual preferences or reveal clues about your physical attributes. The first date is not about sex, it’s about getting to know each other casually.
Your physical ailments – You don’t like to hear it when your grandma talks about her bursitis and her gout, so don’t bore your date with details about your ingrown toenail, your esophageal spasms and your inability to digest diary products. Not only is it boring, it’s just too much information.
Your stuffed animal collection – So what if you have been collecting stuffed animals your entire life and that you house your collection lovingly on your bed in order of how much you love them? That is just too weird and too much info.
How much money you have or make – Your date will be able to tell a lot about your socio-economic status by your occupation and how you dress on your first date. There is no need to talk about how much money you make or how much you are worth. Ideally your date is interested in who you are not your bank account.
Religion and politics – I think it’s OK to discuss these topics lightly but if you have extreme political or religious beliefs it’s probably best to keep these to yourself at least until the second date.
Tattoos, birthmarks and other physical anomalies – On a first date, no one wants to see your Mom tattoo, your birthmark in the shape of Elvis on your hip, or your semi-webbed toes.
Turn off your cell phone – You may be addicted to your iPhone but don’t reveal this on a first date. Show your date you are focused on the moment by turning off your cell phone.
Your desperate need to get married – Nothing kills the buzz of a first date like an earnest single who is just dying to get married. It is impossible to project how far a relationship may proceed from a first date, so keep it to yourself and don’t scare off your date.
So remember, good conversation is important on a first date but remember the limits of information that you provide and be a good listener.
